Why do we trust what politians say!! We no longer live in a democracy!! Its just one great big farce lok what theyve done with all the mothers and childrens details, What where they fucking playing at. I think the time is due for a massive upheavel of the system we survive in. Younger goverments with a different attitude and focus on life. when i saw gordon brown face today on news tonight all i saw was red anger...

he isnt someone to be trusted none of them are to be honest!!! but a change is as good as a rest DONT YOU THINK!!!

sorry!!!!!

You know half the time im out of control and the other im numb and comfortable....i recently been having nightmares, some more nastier than normal!! these put me in strange moods which leave me with nothing but thoughts in my head i dont like to be with others when this goes on. But other the last week ive had good days been in control of any ANGER ive felt not towards other people. only to myself.

any way ive just been distracted by my owns thoughts, with fleetwood mac on radio...what a moment!!!!!

listen she said with envy and grieve in mind, opeen your thoughts and every page will turn to
gold.

i opened both eyes and watched every curve, as it chased shadows across the floor, one thought was shared and i felt my pain fall away as an avalanche of emotions. she held my head in her arms and cried my pain away, her tears like sweet poison desolving my fear.

she whispererd in my ear "im hear to save you, but first you must do something in return" and with a long breath i swallowed hard as if no action was needed other than surrender!

"you need to kiss me with all you have and nothing more....ive dreamt of this moment all my life and until i met you none had any faces"

of all the people in the world i have met someone like you............to be continued

thats where the light switch is!!!!!

Ello all this is my latest of blogg's been sitting in dark for so long almost forgot where light switch!!!
My short time out of my own personal prison i seem to keep getting stuck in. i seem to be on parole.....and going to take full advantage of it thats how i deal with it most of time..Still solitude isnt the best thing for me, i certainly need it though. ive had some major advance in dealing with my emotions just letting do what they wanna do and reckonising when they get to strong then im more prepared for it..still most of the time i just seem to fall down pick myself up fall down etc etc..oh well what doesnt kill me makes me stronger i guess.

anyway i wrote "war of soldiers" when i was day dreaming and getting stuck with my politcal views having arguments with myself. i have so many opinions they clash. its was written for the soldiers who are currently serving for there country. fighting someones else's war dont get me wrong i think war can be a good thing, i honestly think that this isnt war its suicide. come on people we should start to think of ourselves and question what we hold value in. which is the lives of all humans on this already strained planet..

there are many titles for this poem "war of soldiers" was more in thinking its no longer a soldiers war.


"Colluseum" Is what it title suggests about rome and empire and how it was flattened within a day sad story, But very poinyant i think for our time today.. i beleive in history repeats itself.

Anyway enough for now..

speak soon!!!!

colliseum

a taste of blood
a taste of fire
my eyes caught on desire
entrance of heroes
exit of demons
cast your magic
never tell

i scream
i scream


Pure agony i feel as i curse
a rage from ethereal
no dragons here
no immortal near
all over all gone
the silenced cheer
from a face full of fear

War of soldiers

See the colour of rain
to catch the last train
late at night
all eyes out, for the fright
fancy politicians continue on
Only to discover its all gone
to late to fast one last breath
to save us all

Paint a pretty soldier
bleeding from heart
his enemy dug down deep

and far apart

guns ablaze as skin replaces
a frosty glaze

catch my bullet
catch my bullet

My 7 year old son's blog

i like meat and chocolate mint too
its best to take a chocolate bar
its light as a crisp and chocolate as it is
that is all i like made out of chocolate.
take it more love it alot take it as a bar of chocolate
strawberry chocolate is the best make it Be the best
it is definitely the best its is differenter than the rest.


i see a worm in the mud that is very very very hungry
i get it some mud for it to eat today
yes i picked ate it some more.

SIGNED THE DUDE

THE BIG MOVE

Well not been on blog for aggggessssssss!!!!!
Have been on pills now for over a 7 weeks '20mg citalopram'. Its made me feel very doped up thoughts have slowed down during the day but race in the evening.. wish I didn't feel the way I do but its something I coming more to terms with . finally moved out of flat that has been the biggest and worst time of my life, alot of wasted energy has gone in to that place. Although with the exceptions of the times with my son.

have also started to think about what I want to do next with my life and one of the biggest things I have come up with is a career in music whether it be in a shop or a recording studio. Animals are also a big thing, have been looking into voluntary work with r.s.p.c.a....or some kind of animal rescue place. I think one of my problems is my anger issues, I think its scary for people to witness and I'm sick of it. to be really honest and scaring the people I love most isn't what I'm about